Far Away - A Special Dedication To Tessa On Her 17th Birthday

This time, this place
Misused, mistakes
Too long, too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving
Hold on to me and, never let me go.

Someday Out Of The Blue

Some day out of the blue
In a crowded street or a deserted square
I'll turn and I'll see you
As if our love were new
Some day we can start again, some day soon

Here comes the night
Here come the memories
Lost in your arms
Down in the foreign fields
Not so long ago
Seems like eternity
The sweet afternoons
Still capture me

Some day out of the blue
In a crowded street or a deserted square
I'll turn and I'll see you
As if our love were new
Some day we can start again, some day soon

I still believe
I still put faith in us
We had it all and watched it slip away
Where are we now
Not where we want to be
Those hot afternoons
Still follow me

Some day out of the blue
Maybe years from now
Or tomorrow night
I'll turn and I'll see you
As if we always knew
Some day we would live again, some day soon

I still believe
I still put faith in us

I still believe
I still put faith in us

I still believe
I still put faith in us

Here comes the night
Here come the memories
Lost in your arms
Down in the foreign fields
Not so long ago
Seems like eternity
The sweet afternoons
Still capture me

Some day out of the blue
Maybe years from now
Or tomorrow night
I'll turn and I'll see you
As if we always knew
Some day we would live again, some day soon

Some day out of the blue
In a crowded street or a deserted square
I'll turn and I'll see you
As if our love were new
Some day we can start again, some day soon

I still believe
I still put faith in us

I still believe
I still put faith in us

I still believe
I still put faith in us

(Fade)
I still believe
I still put faith in us

Peace In The Living Room

The Cold War is over. The walls have fallen. It took a week, but it happened. A diplomatic breakthrough occurred, sitting in front of a television set watching football. Differences settled, an understanding reached. Not emotional by any standards, but still a resolution. My dad and I have finally made up our differences, and we started by finding a common ground. Football. Manchester United. Both of us are rabid fans, and it was the first common ground rediscovered. Saturday night I flipped on the telly, and was watching a game when he came out of the room to have a coffee. We started talking, and the long and short of it is that we settled the whole argument, he has his son back and I have my father back.

In any case, he has agreed not to wind me up over small issues, and I've agreed not to fly off the handle at small arguments. I have to learn, I guess. Maybe I should stop going into nearly every argument to try and prove something.

7 Days

Cold War

The Cold War was first fought between two opposing ideologies, and since then, countless miniature versions have been fought between parents and their teenagers, which were likewise another conflict of ideas. Well, I fought one just before the O's, and it looks like I'm fighting one again.

Since Monday, my father and I have refused to speak to each other, and only accept the other's presence as a formality. Why? Because he refused to accept me going to poly, reneging on a promise that he would support me wholeheartedly. Monday night, he kept badgering me about whether I could make the grade or not.

For those who know me well enough, I work best when people do NOT constantly question my confidence or my motivation. For those not in the know, let me tell you that it is one of the best ways to piss me off, that is, if you're cruisin' for a bruisin'. Why so? Well the simple fact is that the more others question me, the more I question myself, and I can be very self-critical, not exactly what others would think of me.


Anyway, back to my little story. Point is, my dad and I have been ignoring each other, even when we went down with a flu one after another. Well, my decision has been made. I like it this way. He doesn't bother about me, I couldn't give a rat's ass or a flying f*** about him. I LIKE IT. If he doesn't like me going to poly, I can still go overseas. I've been reading up on some high schools overseas, and it seems that I qualify to go overseas to study, if I can get my visa approved. All I need now is for that one catalyst, that one spark that will set off an inferno. That one domino that will set off a chain of events that would lead to me leaving Singapore for a foreign shore. ALONE. I don't give a shit if my dad goes berserk over it. All that gives me is what he owes me. Years of freedom. Oh, and he still owes me money. And if he wants to keep me here, he's gonna have to bloody well find me.

Rockabilly Revival

An update on my life in general. Since SAJC is beginning to turn away 9-pointers, I guess that little-ole-me has no chance whatsoever of getting anything outta this. *Sigh* After all the things I've done for this crapheap they call an educational institution this is what they do to me? Oh well, gotta hold my head up high and walk on. To all my friends, no matter whether you know me as a school friend, a SuperTeen friend, or in any other relation, like drama, debates and speech competitions, if you've made it to SA, my heartiest congratulations to you all. You've done better than I did, and probably deserved it more than me. Yes, I'm talking to you, Rahman, Samuel Stephens, Veerababu, Cheney, Levin, Erica, Felissa Lim, and any others I might've missed out. But I will see you all again one day. I promise you that. Now then, MOVING ON!

I'm going back to my old roots. Rockabilly and Country music is the way for me, along with Greasers, Rockers, Cowboys, chopped bikes, aviators, leather jackets, Stetsons, boots, brass knucks, switchblades and the rest of that culture. I will occasionally put in new songs for my collection, but I wish to first ground myself in the rockabilly ways. CCR, Elvis, Cash, and all the rest. A new direction. Another Earthquake.

I will see you again, on the 10th. 17+1+1, I Love You. But it's now up to you, to say if you love me too.

February Song

Where has that old friend gone
Lost in a February song
Tell him it won't be long
Til he opens his eyes, opens his eyes

Where is that simple day
Before colors broke into shades
And how did I ever fade
Into this life, into this life

And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away
When all that I've known is lost and found
I promise you I, I'll come back to you one day

Morning is waking up
And sometimes it's more than just enough
When all that you need to love
Is in front of your eyes
It's in front of your eyes

And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away
Sometimes it's hard to find the ground
Cause I keep on falling as I try to get away
From this crazy world

And I never want to let you down
Forgive me if I slip away
When all that I've known is lost and found
I promise you I, I'll come back to you one day

Where has that old friend gone
Lost in a February song
Tell him it won't be long
Til he opens his eyes
Opens his eyes.

24 Hours, Or So

In a day's time it's Valentine's Day. A Hallmark holiday marked by the giving of flowers, cards, chocolates, and other interesting gifts. In my case, just a card, I think. I'm stuffing all money into the bank, to be removed at a later date. My friends are all on hiatus, I believe. Most have not updated their blogs or talked to me too much. Not exactly the best way to maintain friendships, but I guess it will continues like this for a while. I wonder where I'm headed? I guess my ultimate fate is in someone else's Hands, for now. Not the way I planned it. But still, it's my choice, now I must live with it. I guess now all I can do is write about it.

1 Necklace, 17 Flowers, 17 Candles, 1 Love,
forever yours.

A Fork In The Road

All right, not everything has gone to plan these past weeks. Still, I believe the best is yet to come. I have come to a crossroads in my educational life, and I'm not sure which road I'm headed down. But one thing's for sure, I will always have my friends backing me up. You know, it's so reassuring to me that I can count on all my friends when I need them.

Alright, now for something completely different. I'm saving up cash for some new gear I've always wanted, so I may not be sponsoring any meals anytime soon. That being said, I might still pay for lunch or dinner, on special occasions. Also, I canceled my Maroon 5 tickets. Too expensive, and the special girl I asked is busy on the same day. Alas, it is not to be. Slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and all that, eh? More updates soon.

17 Years, 237 T's, 18 O's, 6205 Days, 1 LIFE.

It's Been Great. 17 years on this good earth, 17 years of life, love, tears, joy, laughter and all life's little wonders. I've made many friends, fought a few enemies, lost loved ones, seen people come and go in the revolving door that is life, and I'm the better for it. I've fallen in love, become a young man, survived many a date with destiny, walked away from so many things and embraced so many others. I've had regrets, moments of insanity, but also taken my chances, and seen flashes of brilliance. To all who have impacted me and given me life, friendship, and love, I Salute You, I Appreciate You And I Love You. May the days of your lives be kind, warm, long, and full of the blessings you have bestowed upon a fool such as I. God Bless Us, Everyone.

You'll Never Walk Alone

When you walk through a storm,
Hold your head up high
And don't be afraid of the dark.
At the end of the storm,
Is a golden sky,
And the sweet, silver song of a lark.

Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Though your dreams be tossed and blown.
Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart,
And you'll never walk alone,
You'll never walk alone.

When you walk through a storm,
Hold your head up high,
And don't be afraid of the dark.
At the end of the storm,
Is a golden sky,
And the sweet, silver song of a lark.

Walk on through the wind,
Walk on through the rain,
Though your dreams be tossed and blown.
Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart,
And you'll never walk alone,
You'll never walk alone.