The One Constant In The World

Change. Ya gotta love it. It comes along out of the blue, and smacks straight into you when you're just going on, minding your own business. Bolt out of the bloody blue. Whoop-de-effin-doo. Anyway, here's confirmation of my current status, and my plans.

I have officially dropped out of my course. I am now an intern at a finance company. I plan to resume my studies next year. I have no intention of returning to my old course, or other engineering/science course, for that matter. I still plan to get my driver's license. My endpoint is still the same, just that the route has changed slightly.

I have made a few promises I fully intend to keep. First off, I will pay for the net's popcorn. I am completely serious. Second. I will learn as much as I can on my job, and not succumb to possible boredom. Third. I will pay attention to a friend's advice that sometimes, she might be right in front of me, but I might not see her...once I figure out what the hell that means. Fourth. I will keep going to the gym. Fifth. Start my Christmas list.

To all who are gonna have exams soon, all the best. For those starting school again, just chill... you'll get over it...it's another tequila sunrise, that's all.

Life Is A Highway

I'm less tired than I was at the start of the break. Also, less bored. Several interesting events have unfolded. I'm much better for them. It's been a good few weeks.

I have a few announcements to make. Firstly, I am leaving my course of studies. Whatever was taught sure hasn't stuck. Probably never will. I will be getting a job when term re-opens, and will not be returning to school, except maybe to pinch some movies, books and the like. Or I might do that during the last week of break. Whatever works out, I guess.

Secondly, I am giving up my pursuit of her. I did send her an email asking her out, just for a movie and coffee, but have yet to receive a proper response. Also, since I am leaving my course (and most probably the polytechnic), it don't seem too sensible to keep her thinking I'm trying something. I leave that part of my life to chance, fate and time.

Third. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAHMAN! Yeah, yeah, I'm weeks late, but still, better late than never, eh? (I really need to stop procrastinating, retyping entire articles and deleting them). Anyway, here's wishing you all the best for promo results. Ride on, my brother-in-arms!

Fourth. I am trying to hammer out a plan for my life, or at least the education part of it. Yes, I'm actually thinking hard during a holiday break. No, I don't mean that I was not thinking when I was talking about your life. Of course I was thinking, and not on autopilot. It's just that I am putting as much serious thought as I can into this. All better now? Good. Thank you. Now sod off, you hypersensitive bitch. No wait! I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, it was meant for the other guy. Yeah, you at the back, the one who didn't get it...oh never mind.

Now, for something a little less serious.

I've been going out a lot more lately. 2 badminton games, 1 basketball game, lunch, a school tour, a gaming spree, and more food and drink. For once, I actually enjoyed myself bags more, rather than the usual sitting in front of a computer, like I'm doing now. So, to the cool cats of region 3/4, who planned and organized all the events, thanks for a job well done. Boredom has been alleviated.

Let's see, am I missing anything....nope, don't think I have. Well, til next time chaps. Oh wait. Yeah. Paul Newman has gone to the great roundup in the sky. This video is posted in his honor. To the Hudson Hornet.

Sod It All

Holidays. Bloody hell. More like boredom, if you ask me. Me dad is still stalling over the job, I have no idea how my exams went (though I hope I failed everything), I don't have much to look forward to, all my games have gone stale, and I've finished watching all the stuff my dad and i bought on our $500 spending spree. Oh yeah, and some updates on that list of mine.

1. Get The Girl. - Big mistake. She seems to be too busy/uninterested in guys at the moment.
2. Get my JJ-ness back. - Well, this one's a little better. Despite being utterly bored, I've at least started reading books again, and I'm trying to understand how my thought processes, beliefs, ideas, philosophies and experiences were formed. In short, I'm beginning to understand me again.
3. Get a job. - Like I said, my dad's stalling. Maybe Gold 90FM has a student DJ position.
4. Get money. - Besides my weekly pittance, not much unless I get a job....
5. Get lots of fun. - Everyone seems to be busy or camping, so no fun as of yet.
6. Get fit. - Faring the best. Knocked off about two kilos so far, should be down to 91 by the end of the hols.
7. Get ready to rock 'n roll. - This one's half and half. I found a nice Epiphone guitar pack (Les Paul Special II no less) for about $600. Problem? I need $600.

Bloody effin' hell, what a lousy rotten holiday this is. And it's now 3am on a Monday morning, with results out tomorrow and a day of badminton to look forward to. A favourite line of mine, hopefully prophetic at this time...Business is about to pick up.

Fluctuations And Other Obscenities

A Chinaman walks into a restaurant and orders some food. After the meal, he looks at the bill and asks why it is so expensive this week when last week he paid 20% less for the same dishes. The waiter replies:" Fluctuations", to which the Chinaman replies, "Fluck you too."

A Jew says to a Chinaman:" Hey you chink, stop squinting!" The Chinaman replies," Hey, it's your fault, Jew, you sold me these cheap glasses!"

This ends my little presentation. Thank you very much, ladies and gentlemen.

Prices are going down, and portions are going up. Oh, wait, that's the other way around. Ah well. Guess it will do me good to eat less than eight meals a day. Yeah, I used to eat breakfast, a mid-morning snack, brunch, lunch, an afternoon nibble, tea, dinner, coffee and finally, supper. Oh, and add in various miscellaneous bites of this and that when I'm feeling peckish. So yeah, I'm just your average ordinary everyday polar bear...err, I meant teenager.

Exams have ended. I might do well. Pigs might fly. Whales might walk. Aliens might exist. I might stop cracking racist and dirty jokes. Yeah, like that's ever gonna happen.

My holidays are until the 12th of October. Yep, read it and weep, buddies. 12th October. Bloody hell, that's a lot of time on my hands. Time to start getting of my arse and getting a good job. As a chef. Yeah, that's an idea. Poison people with too much sugar, milk, cream, salt, eggs, pepper and other ingredients and condiments. Oh, and salad. Wait, what? AAAAAH! Think junk food! JUNK FOOD! CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM WITH VANILLA CREAM CHOC CHIPS COOKIES CHOC SAUCE PEANUT BUTTER STRAWBERRY CREAM ICING APPLE CRUMBLE CHEESECAKE AND A BIG FROTHY MUG OF COFFEE WITH FULL FAT MILK SUGAR SOLUTION CHOC SAUCE TOPPED WITH WHIPPED CREAM SUGAR GLAZING AND A CHERRY ON TOP! Yes, much better now.

Y'know, most if not all the nice girls I know have gone to or are in other countries, are attached, or very uptight about getting attached. Was there never a tale of more woe, than Juliet, and searching desperately for her, Romeo?

But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun! Arise, fair sun, and slay the envious moon. It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. - From "Romeo and Juliet, Act 2 Scene 2"

Yeah, and I wrote all that without referring to my copy of R&J. Jolly well done, old boy! Good form and all that. My literature skills might be dormant, but they sure as heck still exist. That's comforting.

Moving on, my plans for the holidays, in no particular order.

1. Get The Girl.
2. Get my JJ-ness back.
3. Get a job.
4. Get money.
5. Get lots of fun.
6. Get fit.
7. Get ready to rock 'n roll.

Here's To Fast Cars, Freedom and Jiahui!

It Ain't Over Til It's Over, And It Ain't Over Yet

Yeah, I know. Title's a real mouthful, ain't it? But hey, it reflects life at the moment. Crisis points have been reached, and they are passing. I am growing stronger and more confident. I like my class much better now. I still want to change course. I wanna rock!

Business is about to pick up. I am reaching the end of the semester. Crunch time. The day of reckoning. Blah blah blah and all that horseshit. I have projects unfinished. I have no classes on Monday. I have much more to say, and not much is related to school.

FFB team has been set. That's right, I ain't a free agent no more. Yessir, I'm a team player now. No more lone wolf, cos I'm running with the pack! I have no idea of the team name, but I'm fully confident of its players. We have the meanest defense this side of Ngee Ann, and I'm their newest addition! Clear The Way!

I finally convinced my dad that I should change course. Now he's all for it, but he ain't as sure that FSV will be a good option. He leans more towards another engineering discipline, due to his belief that engineering builds discipline and trains thought process. I think he's right, but thing is, I don' t want to be an engineer. I want to be something else. This is not my call. It may be a stepping stone, but not a call. I'm sure that there will be further developments, so I must try to keep this blog updated. Moving on!

My school library really needs to wake up. I mean, half the movies I've already seen, and quite a chunk of the music is either boring John Lemon crap, U2 soundalikes, emo piss-shit, and some obscure stuff nobody, not even me, has ever heard of. And a third of their listed available movies are missing or damaged. That really is a shame, y'know? Just when I want to see a good movie, it ain't there. Oh well. Such is life.

National Day's on Friday. Oh, wait, BRYAN says it's on Friday. Not me. Geez, that guy must never read the newspapers, watch TV, check his watch or his phone. Anyway, I'll be going back to my alma mater. Saint Andrew's. Gee, just saying alma mater makes me feel like some old man. Hmm, I shall go back and piss all the sec ones off by telling them how in my day we actually used ink on paper.........actually had to write notes, actually had to queue up in the canteen.......okay, enough with all that old fart nonsense. Little hand says it's time to rock 'n roll.

I Think It's Gonna Be A Long Long Time

This is one heck of a song. And these days, though I am feeling more at home in the poly, I am still lonely. I miss my bros. I really do. Yeah, I'm hanging with a new crowd, but most of them can't hold a candle to the old gang.

I'm beginning to find silver linings behind clouds these days, even though I sound rather depressed. Truth be told, I'm just tired. But I trust that strength will come from somewhere.

I've been nosing around in the library, and discovered some interesting stuff. Soundtracks, rock albums, old movies and rare books. I really love just browsing through and enjoying them in what little free time I have. And I really want to change course. Easy option accusations be damned. I just want for once, to do something I want to do. But first, I must finish my fight. Tie up loose ends, and leave no doubt.

It's a good thing many Flag Football (which henceforth will be referred to as FFB,) people are in ECE division. It helps to have some experienced operators around to help the rookie. And they are really nice people. They are probably the ones who most remind me of the old crowd, a bunch of crazy, fun, hyperactive and friendly guys, obsessed with playing and girls, but also serious about studies...to a certain extent(grin at the broken SS rule).

And ever since I saw her, I can't stop thinking about her. How is she? Is she happy? Is she stressed? Will she turn up next time KTH has an outing? When will I next see her again? Will she give me a chance? So many questions, and I might never get any answers. But I say again, better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all.

Through The Barrier

Time flows on. I am tired. I am battered. I am bruised. I am weary. I am one with my pain. I am one with my hurt. I am at peace. I am free.

It's been a hard day's work. Woke up late, again(aaaagh, must kick the habit), and got to school, late. Had to put up with remarks from my class. Y'know, I hate most of them. Faggots. They think they are all so goddamn clever, eh? Most of 'em are assholes. I won't waste any more space on them. But to the few who make my classroom life a little more enjoyable, I thank you. Bless your hearts for the kindness you've shown. Thank you.

I'm aching, bruised and battered all over. Flag football was one heck of a battle today. The Atlas Knights played The Black Knights. We lost. 4-1. Respectable, but we could have done better. I went down three times. Once, to a clothesline from Nadia(though she didn't really mean it), once to dive tackle Hashim, and once because something in my back gave way. That last one hurt the most. For a few minutes, I was unable to even stand properly, but had to play through the pain and finish the match. Limped off, and tried to fix it myself. Failed miserably, but still managed to get to a nearby pillar, to lean on and take some strain off.

The funny thing is, when I was slumped against that pillar, I was hoping for something to take my mind off the annoying, and very persistent ache in my back. I sure as heck got it. And what a boost it was.

She walked by. She Walked By. SHE WALKED BY! And all I could say was f*cking "Hi!" Dammit, I couldn't even stand properly, let alone walk up to her and ask her out. WHY! Why is it that Lady Luck and her daughter Ms Fortune absolutely must walk hand in effin' hand? Jesus, Mary and Joseph in Tinseltown! Oh, Mary Magdalene! All the Saints and Martyrs and Jesus! Did I happen to mention Jesus? (Spot the movie reference.)

But despite all my bemoaning of Lady Luck's daughter, I still feel really light-headed. I don't know. It's like the minute I saw her I forgot what the hell was wrong with my back. Every nerve in my back was screaming "Sit down, you fool!", but I couldn't give a rat's ass. I swear, even my brain seemed to shut down for a while, and I lost most powers of speech.

I have not seen her in a long time. But her face seems somehow etched in my memory. Like a program you can never delete, and don't want to. Somebody told me at the start of poly, if you don't forget her after three months of not seeing her, it's probably not just a crush. But never rush these things. Be a friend first, boyfriend can wait. Wise words, and I'll follow them. But perhaps I'll allow myself the little indulgence of saying... I Love You.

Omnia Mutantur, Nihil Interit.

Omnia Mutantur, Nihil Interit. Much has happened, much more has changed. And yet nothing is lost. Once again, it's been a long while since I've updated, and I am weary. For someone like me to be bereft of inspiration to write is, well, absurd. And yet, it happened.

After the common tests, I found myself drained. So drained that I simply went blank. Everything somehow ceased to have meaning, and fun lacked any feeling. But I guess it might have been expected. I actually bothered to study my brains out for MATHS and PHYSICS, which ain't exactly my strong points, so perhaps burnout, while not an iota of fun, was worth the trouble. It means I actually put some effort in. God, I hope it pays off.

The holidays have been fun, and given me a much needed respite and recharge. I guess I'm about ready for school, except there are one or two things still left undone. Damned EECAD. Yet another reason for me wanting to change course. Alright, enough moping, time to gear up for the last days of fun!

Oh yeah, I must recap what I've done the past few days. Apart from the usual eating, sleeping, watching TV and playing computer games, I've watched Kung Fu Panda, bought some new CDs, opened a bank account, eaten a high-class lunch at The Padang, and generally run amok. Oh yeah, one or two outings for movies, food, coffee and bowling. I got three days left. Hey waiter! More fun!

Oh yeah, I still like her. Her birthday was during April, and I somehow forgot to get her something (short notice and all). Well, here's a few videos, some for her, and some for my personal inspiration.











Omnia Mutantur, Nihil Interit. Everything Changes, Nothing Is Truly Lost.
Wish You Were Here, But You're In My Heart.

A Confession To Make

I have a small confession to make. Okay, maybe not so small. Alright! A very big one, to me at least. I like someone. I like her very much. I really really like her. I.....hmm, too early to say that. Give it another month or three before I can say that. Bad luck to say that too early. Wait, sod that last comment. You make your own luck. But I gotta keep a hold on myself. Don't rush things. Don't act stupidly. Just hold on for dear life. And shut my trap. Yeah, that'll work(I hope). Here's looking at you, kid.

Oh, a little musing for all my friends as well. For Rahman and Wei Jie, a dream is always alive, as long as there are one or two fools left to dream. For Dino and Kay, JUSTINA!

I've been reassessing my life, and trying to put everything in perspective. I realised that I joined AE for all the wrong reasons, and that I was being foolish in trying to make a weakness and strength. I pray that the Man residing in Heaven sees fit to give me a chance to change course and redeem my foolishness. God help me. Amen.

A talk with my advisory lecturer has gotten things looking up. I told her my whole problem, and she said I seemed to have pretty good reason for a transfer. Add that to my CCA records, and I get very good credentials to make my case.

And according to another friend of mine, people have transferred for lesser reasons. It seems that business is about to pick up. Now, time for some serious work, and a little strategy. Fundamentals of Aerospace Tech is open book, so I will print all the relevant lecture notes and bring my textbook. Haha! A Cunning Plan! More cunning than a fox wot 'as been appointed prof of cunning at Camford University! More on studies to follow, soon.

Now, net on Friday equals potluck equals stuff myself and comment on how everybody else does light dishes. What happened to the pot in potluck, people? Sometimes, you guys really amaze me...

Here's some other less depressing stuff. Flag Football league is starting up soon, a chance for me to tear up the fields, thundering towards the foes! Wonder who should I join...Faugh A Ballagh! Garryowen And Glory!

49th. The 7th 7. What An Achievement! Here's a little spark for the upcoming summer!

A Warm May Holiday

What a day! I'm tanked up on coffee and food, blogging while listening to my music, and ready to rush my e-learning tomorrow, so I can sit in front of the computer, finish my projects, and kick back. I've had much fun, so it will soon be time for the work to begin. Strangely, I can't wait!

Day started off well. A great Monday, what with it being a holiday and all. Woke up on time, and met up with Rahman, Jeremy and Weijie at Bryan's house. Abel came along later. We had some fun mucking around with guitars, a pool table, and cards. Not too much interesting stuff happened, but all of it was fun nonetheless.

The original plan was to muck around at Bryan's, then head off by ourselves, but plans change. We ended up at more or less the same area(Suntec and Marina), so I guess that counts as a slight deviation. We had lunch, and slacked around talking in a Coffee Bean for an hour or so, catching up. I hope we will have more days like this, which are both serious and fun at the same time, where we laugh, and learn even more about each other. My hope is that this whole group will stick together for a long time to come, and never forget one another.

We ended up in Carl's Jr later having drinks and fries. Went home with Jeremy after that. We had a very interesting conversation on the train, about the possibility of forming a band. A very strange one, with a stranger name and a weird musical sense. I bet the critics would love it. The kind of crap on the market these days, i don't think they would mind a "revolutionary, groundbreaking, experimental and eclectic sound". That is to say, the myriad musical influences thrown into a pot and served beasting...err, I meant bursting. No wait, I meant served up with sass, panache and style. Ahh, what the hell am I spewing? A band named "A F*cking Waste Of Time", with a debut album titled "A Steaming Pile of Crap" and a greatest hits collection called "Unbelievable Bullshit Vols 1, 2 and 3" is one heck of a dream, but not half-likely to happen. Too shocking and daring. *Sighs* Well, I guess I'd better stick to less controversial stuff.

Alright, enough of that. I will write more tomorrow, so for now, Adieu, Au Revoir and Goodnight!